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There are so many layers to the stuff J has been exposed to but one that was abundantly clear on day one is that he has not been around a lot of healthy relationships and has no real context for healthy physical contact. He says "ewww" to me kissing my kids on the head, his teacher telling him to kiss his brain when he says something smart, and especially any affection shown between my husband and myself. There are moments when it's sad and moments when it's funny. He has told everyone - e v e r y o n e - who will listen that Josh and I are disgusting and we kiss on the lips. Adri has a really spot-on impression of him saying "ewwww you nasty, you kiss on the lips." He has shared this with his teacher, his caseworker, his biological sister, and a room full of moms waiting to pick up their daughters from dance class, to name a few. We don't know how to navigate all of this but when he says I'm nasty because I kiss daddy on the lips I've just said "yep, I do, because he is my husband and I love him." I've also pointed out every time he helps me with something (which is often!) that he will be a great husband one day and will love his wife well. He usually says ewww but I'm determined to just be myself and to display a picture of marriage that is different than he understands.
Monday he had a visit with a counselor and his caseworker told me that when she asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, he said "married." I thought that was the sweetest thing and one of the greatest compliments I've received from him. I'm thankful for my husband's role in his life and the difference that it is making. I love it so much I could kiss him on the lips. ;)
