I already explained how it came about for us to begin fostering so let me see if I can attempt to tackle the "why."
Fostering was on our hearts long before we shared it with many people. The individual experiences that Josh and I have had over the course of our lives have created this collective idea that what we have is not our own. And specifically, my heart breaks that there are children that aren’t really being given a chance because they don’t have a safe place to stay. Together we feel like we have an opportunity to bring hope into a broken little life.
The thing that has made me the most uncomfortable throughout the licensing process has been the number of people who have acted like we are super spiritual because we’ve decided to do this. I promise you that we are not. Our friends and family could affirm that. The only thing we are is available and for us, this isn’t an over-spiritualized thing. We are a family that has an extra bed and we feel like we can provide safety and stability for a child who doesn’t have that. Are we scared? Absolutely. Will it be an inconvenience? Sure. Will it have an impact on our own children? Probably. Would all of these things be true if we were pregnant with another biological child? Yes. And at the end of the day, we have to trust God with the unknowns that are before us. And they are there - they are certainly there - but sometimes you have these moments where you just know. People often say that when they fall in love or when they are looking for a wedding dress or when they buy a house. They “just know.” I guess I would describe our becoming foster parents in a similar way to that. We just feel like God has told us to do it and that this is a mission that has been laid out for our family. We just know.
I can only explain the knowing to the Holy Spirit because if we weren’t 100% sure, we would’ve backed out by now. Honestly, the process is really invasive. There is a lot of paperwork. A lot. And we had to share stuff from every detail of our financial information to our family history to our ideas about how we would deal with a kid who steals. I am raising three children in my home every single day and yet for some reason when the DHEC guy was coming to my house to see if it was safe and clean, I felt nervous. I don’t even know what I was nervous about but it is a little bit uncomfortable when you have people from various organizations in your home checking on things that no one cared about with your biological children. And we had to do some moving around and rearranging of various rooms in our house to create a space for a foster child. Then we had to replace every single smoke detector, install two carbon monoxide detectors, and purchase a special size fire extinguisher. We had to pay babysitters to keep our other kids while we attended all-day training sessions. We all had to have medical exams, bloodwork, and tb tests done. It has required time and money and inconvenience just to get licensed. We haven’t even started caring for a child yet!
In nearly every area of my life I would describe myself as a thinker. Josh has to remind me often to “just stop thinking about (fill-in-the-blank on whatever I'm overthinking)." But this has been one area where I feel like God has protected my mind from overthinking. At the end of the day, we just feel like none of the worries or inconveniences or costs of time or money should stand in the way of our ability - and dare I say, obligation - to care for an orphan. I am having to pray often against a "Savior complex" because I am well aware that many children don't come in wanting to be saved and if my motivation is to do something significant in the life of a child where I am left feeling like the hero then I'm probably going to be disappointed. We aren't trying to save the world through foster care, we are just trying to be obedient in providing stability for a small number of children. So that’s why. It’s because we are believers. It’s because we have the means. It’s because we feel like the Church has an obligation to care for needy children. It’s because God has stirred our hearts and led us to look outside of what is comfortable. It's because Josh has worked in schools for 13 years and knows what kind of stuff is out there. It's because we've had times in our own lives where we needed to be cared for but we had people around us who were able to do that. There is nothing "amazing" about us, we aren't super spiritual, and we certainly aren't the best parents on the planet, but we just feel like this tug on our hearts shouldn't be ignored.